The 5 Keys to being in a Long Distance Relationship
Let’s face it–no one knows what to expect when going into a long distance relationship. Of course you hope to be the couple that stays together that everyone asks “how did you do it?” But, in reality, who knows what is going to happen when distance is put into the equation? No one can predict how a relationship will end, but there are ways that you can give your long distance relationship the best chance of surviving. There are multiple things that you can do to make your long distance relationship be happy, healthy, and successful .
My boyfriend and I have been in a long distance relationship for 3 years. Only two months into our relationship he went off to college in a different state. We determined in the beginning that we were going to try to stay together, but we did not exactly know what we were getting ourselves into. Although we’ve hit some bumps in the road, overall, our relationship has been awesome. While it has definitely not been easy, along the way we figured out some things that we needed to focus on to help our relationship stay alive. I am here to tell you that being in a long distance relationship is possible as long as you keep these things in mind.
1. Communication
If you’re going to be in a long distance relationship, communication is KEY. It is definitely the most important part of being in a long distance relationship. If you are able, try and talk on the phone or FaceTime pretty often. I asked my boyfriend what he has learned over the course of our relationship, and he said “I’ve really just learned that I have to take time out of my day to talk to you. It’s a thing that I have to be very intentional about because it isn’t easy when we’re not in person.” And he is completely right. It isn’t easy to remember to call someone when you’re out living you’re life, but communication of some sort is vital. Texting is okay, but honestly, a lot of misunderstandings can happen over text messages because you can’t hear the tone of someone’s voice when you’re just reading words. If you aren’t able to text or talk on the phone, go the old fashioned romantic way and write letters. 😉 Not being able to hear your significant other’s voice every once in a while makes staying together much harder, but if your relationship is strong enough, it’s definitely possible. While communication is a very important part of staying together, if you’re not able to, don’t assume that you’re relationship will end. With enough dedication on both ends, a long distance relationship can survive with just a little bit of communication.
2. Work
Long distance relationships are hard, and they take a lot of work. I know that is probably not what you want to hear, (it certainly wasn’t what I wanted to hear when I looked up “how to be in a long distance relationship” on Pinterest when I was first getting into it) but it’s true. Long distance relationships take WORK. You have to go into it knowing that you both have to be super considerate of the other person, and you have to put each other first. You’re both going to be doing your own things when you’re apart, so you need to keep in mind that although you may not feel like it, you need to tell your partner what is going on in your life. When you’re in a long distance relationship, you don’t get to see what the other person is doing all the time. Therefore, you need to work to stay faithful, you need to work to keep a healthy relationship, and you need to work to stay together. It is a whole lot of work, but trust me, it is so worth it.
3. Remember everything isn’t always going to be peachy
I think this goes for any relationship, long distance or not. You have to remember that you are not always going to be ridiculously happy and in love; unless you are a perfect couple, there are going be times that you don’t want to deal with your significant other. You’re going to argue, and you might even consider breaking up. BUT, if you are really committed to and love this person enough, even when you’re angry you have to remember that you love them. It gets especially hard in long distance relationships because when you argue, odds are it’ll be over the phone, and you can just hang up. You don’t get to sit there and stare your significant other in the face until you just kiss and make up. You just have to keep in mind that your relationship is more worth more than this one fight, and that you love each other.
4. Compromise
Something that everyone in a long distance relationship has to learn how to do is compromise. When you’re many miles apart, you’re not going to be doing all of the same things together. You’re going to have different schedules, and on some things, you’re going to have to compromise. You’re not always going to agree on how to handle things, so it is really important to be able to meet each other in the middle. Whether it is compromising what time you’ll talk on the phone, or when one of you will visit the other, compromising is something that has to be done in long distance relationships.
5. Remember the end goal
The end goal of most long distance relationships is to finally get to be together in person. When you’re doing the long distance thing, it can seem so far away, but holding onto the hope that you will be together eventually makes it so much easier. And remember, if you’re truly dating the person you’re meant to be with, everything will work out in the end.
I hope this post helps! If you have any other long distance relationship tips, let me know in the comments below! 🙂
